Thursday, 31 January 2019

Stand Out From the Crowd


“When you STEPOUT, you will Stand out, when you stand out you will definitely be Noticed and when you get Noticed, it means you will be a signboard for many to read. This will be the beginning of building the Empire of your life.” ― Oscar Bimpong

Vocabulary.com says thus: “To stand out is to attract attention, either for the way you look or behave, or because you perform better at something than other people do. You stand out when you do something really remarkable, inspiring and valuable. On the other side of the road is to fit in. To fit in is to be socially compatible with other members of a group; to conform, be in harmony; to belong; blend in; and constitute part of a larger structure.

For teenagers, fitting in or gaining peer acceptance is a huge achievement. It gives a sense of belonging and even makes you popular. We ascribe this to peer pressure or influence because teenagers want to feel accepted and valued by their friends. True, peer influence can be positive or negative but the teenager that will stand out must find the right balance between being themselves and fitting in with the group.

Keith Allison, as a student in 2013, wrote the following;
You are your own person. Your entire life, you will be you. There are billions of people out there, and you are unique. If we are all so unique, how do we fit in? Why do we care so much about fitting in? If all you need in life is yourself, then we shouldn’t need to be accepted by others. But in a society where people will starve, shave, and change themselves to be accepted, you can’t help but to conform to fit into this society where people will cut, clip, and kill themselves if they aren’t accepted. A society so shallow …
Layers of makeup, pools of mascara or pounds of plastic won’t change who you are on the inside, but who cares what’s under skin-deep? Society expects a Barbie doll out of a Cabbage Patch Kid, and our schools are Build-a-Bear workshop that transform an innocent little kindergartner into a self conscious teenager who is so scared of being rejected she would put out to be called pretty. And why do people do this? Why is it so important to be a piece of this messed up puzzle that is society?
The answer is simply because we have the need to feel like we belong somewhere. If we don’t fit in, we see ourselves as outcasts, as loners. It’s not healthy to feel that way. But the truth is, outcasts are who we really are. If we are all unique, we can never truly fit in.
This is why we have fights break out. This is why we don’t all get along in our groups, because all groups really are is a bunch of outcasts with something in common. We try not to acknowledge this, because if we do, it takes away all the warm feelings of us feeling we have a home base, a group to call our own. It takes away the magic of having a friend, because all a friend truly is, is a unique outcast that you have more stuff in common with than others.
We put a blindfold over our eyes, not wanting to admit we don’t belong. We don’t fit in. We don’t truly have a place of our own. If only we could free ourselves from the warm, fuzzy feeling we crave. If we could only bring ourselves to strip off our blindfolds. Because if we could, then maybe, just maybe, if we could accept that we’re all different, we wouldn’t have to change ourselves. We could change society.   
Everyone is different. All of us are different from others in some way – we have our own distinct race, athletic abilities, academic strengths, body size and shape, kinds of clothes we wear, colour and style of our hair, religion, attraction to other people, family situation, family rules, and beliefs about the world. So, really, being different is normal. Who you are is complicated, and is changing as you are growing up. Figuring out who you are and how you fit in is not easy and might feel very lonely sometimes. Friends and other people at school may have ideas about what you should wear, think, like, or do. Wanting to be liked is definitely natural. It can be hard to be yourself when you feel that other people are watching or judging you. Try to pay attention to yourself and what is right for you. Remember, differences are what make you interesting (www.ghc.org).

“The world accommodates you for fitting in, but only rewards you for standing out.” ― Matshona Dhliwayo


I love to read articles by Ms. Lolly Daskal. Apart from being such a passionate writer, she is also the President and CEO, Lead From Within. In her article, “18 Powerful Ways You Can Stand Out in a Crowd”, she provides strategies that truly work below;
1.     Be disciplined. Most entrepreneurs are people of impulse, and most passionate people live by feelings. But those who understand and practice the art of discipline can channel those impulses into something of substance.
2.     Know yourself. Get feedback from others and learn as much as you can about how you come across. Then you can accurately target how you appear in a crowd and what you need to work on.
3.     Be conscious.  Showing up consciously means always being on time, honoring your commitments, and being prepared. Nothing is more powerful than an individual acting out of a well-developed consciousness.
4.     Be confident. When you truly believe you can create what you envision, when you're not afraid of the obstacles, that confidence will automatically make you stand out from the rest.
5.     Practice listening. Learn to listen truly listen--to work toward a deep  understanding and hear what's being said beyond the words. You will stand out in any situation if you become a person who listens from the heart.
6.     Cultivate emotional intelligence. Too many otherwise smart people don't know how to manage their emotions or relate to others well. Emotional intelligence attracts people who are looking to connect with someone who has their act together and who's competent and capable.
7.     Be response-able.  Be the kind of person who responds and remembers to follow through. Most people drop the ball and don't follow up. Respond to emails, calls, requests, and inquiries as soon as you can. You will stand out as a person who respects others and is accountable.
8.     Lead with excellence. Let people know that quality is a core value, that everything that you do you do with excellence. Leading with excellence prepares you to deliver high-quality work and makes you stand out as a professional.
9.     Know your motives. Why do you do what you do? How well do you know your purpose--your why? Knowing your motivation helps you keep going and makes you easy for others to relate to.
10. Take yourself seriously. Being a entrepreneur, leader, or businessperson requires that you become a master at your craft. It means being competent at the things you do, constantly honing and developing your skills in every way possible. When you take yourself seriously, so do others.
11. Always be of service. Being useful, being helpful is an important aspect of making a great impression. Show up with a spirit of empathy and something to give. An attitude of service makes people interested in what you have to offer.
12. Don't make everything about you. Few things are more boring than a self-centered person. When you met someone make the conversation about them, not you. Be interested and engaged; ask questions and listen carefully.
13. Be kind to everyone. Lots of people are only nice to those who can do something for them. Stand out by treating everyone as important and interesting--even those who can do nothing for you in return.
14. Be prepared. When an opportunity turns up, the person who is ready and able to be part whatever needs to happen will always stand out.
15. Be a master collaborator. Be a great team player. Make others look good and sound good. When you collaborate well, people remember how you made them feel--and when people feel good around you, you stand out.
16. Love yourself. It has nothing to do with ego, but a confidence within you that elevates your relationships with everything else. You'll stand out by being modest but happy with who you are.
17. Be inspirational. A passion for life attracts others to you. To stand out and inspire others, you first must be inspirational.
18. Make your life your message. Make sure that everything you do--how you show up, how you act, what you say, what you do--is a reflection of who you are, so your character and spirit are consistent across every situation.
Great things can happen when you set yourself up to be noticed in the right ways. Practice these tips and you'll not only stand out in the crowd but probably travel far beyond it.
“To stand out from the crowd requires you to stand up and stand for what you believe in.” ― Gift Gugu Mona

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